I haven’t blogged in a very long time. I was suppose to start back up a year ago but life became very hectic. “Life is what happens to you while you‘re busy making other plans.” ― Allen Saunders Needless to say a lot has changed in the last year or so. I am now a proud Mother to a one and a half year old, her name is Maliyah. I will provide updates on all that has changed over the last year or so in a later post.
I have been checking in on my stats and comments every few months but haven’t written a new post in about a year. I attempted to publish a few posts but they all ended up as unfinished unpublished drafts. So in yet another attempt, I am finally returning to start blogging again. As I was checking my comments I missed a few that got categorized as spam. One message from one of my readers really stood out and wanted to share her message with all of you. As well as my response to her. I never intended for this to be my first post starting again but you never know what could happen.
My reader’s name is Sahar and this was the comment she left me on my post “Changing Direction In Life…”:
I’m writing a term paper in my intro to poetry class right now; I’m doing a study on similarities and differences between two poems by E. E. Cummings, one of which is Dive for Dreams. It’s during my research that I came across your post about Charlie St. Cloud. Then I sifted through some of your other posts and this one caught my attention.
I will be 21 this summer, and reading what you posted here felt like reading my own thoughts reflected back at me. I had been living in a comfort zone for years where stories were my refuge, but not too long ago, I made the decision to be more involved in the world around me and do more things that scare me, because I needed to grow as a person and become stronger. Despite that, I don’t think I could ever give up my passion for writing. This aspect of my comfort zone is not just an escape for me, it’s talent that I love.
A few days back, I made the decision to try self publishing, but I was hesitating because I don’t know if I’m going to fail at it, and in case I do, I don’t want to risk having my bad decision cost those who care about me and who are helping me achieve my dream. What you said has really helped me and made me more determined to follow my dream.
So I just want to thank you.
This was my very late reply to her:
Dear Sahar, Saturday April 7th, 2014
I apologize for not responding sooner. I hope and pray this message reaches you. I haven’t blogged in a long time. My life got crazy and a lot changed over the last 2 years. I am now a proud Mother of a one & a half year old. Her name is Maliyah. I am finally returning to start blogging again and your post definitely inspired me as well. You made my day! To be able to connect with someone who is going through what you went through previously is amazing. I wish I had seen this post so I could’ve written sooner. You think 21 is a turning point? Wait until you turn 22 this summer (2014). A lot of changes at that age as well, at least for me there was. I look forward to hearing about all your adventures. Please feel free to share some of your writing with me as well. On here or via my contact info which is in my about me section on this blog.
As for your writing, never stop. Always carry a small notebook in your purse, you might be surprised when a great thought or beautiful words cross your mind. I even sometimes text thoughts or send e-mails to myself on my cell, so that I don’t lose thoughts or ideas I have spur of the moment. I suggest maybe even try carrying a small recorder. I just purchased one recently from Best Buy because it has been harder to write down all my thoughts and ideas chasing after a toddler who is in constant need of attention. It still doesn’t replace the feel of writing with a pen or typing on a computer as your thoughts and words develop. I have found new ways to reinvent myself and reconnect with writing, in order to get back into blogging. I’m curious, have you tried blogging? I originally thought one day I could get paid for my posts but realized years later WordPress doesn’t pay for posting. But I don’t regret choosing the site because it is a great platform to reach the world. I am amazed by how many readers I have on a daily basis, even throughout the time I haven’t been posting. I am more amazed by the origin of each reader. I strongly suggest starting a blog on here if you haven’t already. The ripples of your words will be shocking. You will be amazed by how many people you can touch all over the world with your posts.
In response to your fear of failure, the only way to succeed is to fail along the way. Everyone who is a professional was once a beginner and feared failure. But through each failure they did not stop and give up or throw the towel in, they got back up and tried again. They persevered! “Fall seven times, stand up 8.” Do not fear making mistakes or failing before success. In order to become a success, you’ve got to believe in yourself and in your ability. No matter how many times you fall, you need to keep getting back up. There is always someone out there who can help you make your dreams come true. Some people are just better at helping others make their dreams come to fruition. Find that someone. Keep pushing until you find that someone or that place that can make your dreams come true. The biggest tools to help you succeed are to be genuine, be yourself, and promote what you love. Promote yourself and your passion for writing. “The squeakiest wheel gets the oil.” No one will know about who you are if you don’t share your writing with someone or even the world. Passion is contagious and addicting. It sparks a fire within others, as you share your passion with them. Share who you are with the world and they will come to you. You might be surprised how many people you will inspire and motivate and how many lives you will touch on your journey.
When I started my blog, I was afraid but I jumped in. It’s funny because in a lot of ways we are very similar. Check out my two posts on fear. The first entitled “Fear Here I Come….” is about my attempts at my dream to blog amongst other things:
and the second post is entitled “Fear and Failure…Where Will Your Potential Take You?” is about how fear paralyzes even the strongest of individuals:
One reason I jumped into blogging the first day I started this blog on WordPress was because I saw a woman on Oprah who asked the audience how many things they could have accomplished by now if they had started a year ago. I have spent so many years contemplating how to start things and dreaming about starting things, that I let so much time pass by. That was when I realized the best way is to dive in. Make mistakes and learn. Gain experience and excel, maximize your potential. Learn as much as you can and ask as many people for their help and expertise. “Knowledge is power.” Become an expert. Learn from others working or excelling in your dream career. Another reason is because I was also inspired by the story of “Julie & Julia” and wondered where my blog would take me. I was curious about how many lives I could touch and change, as well as how much my life would change if I pursued one of my many dreams.
I just turned 27 and I’m still afraid of failure but we wouldn’t be human without fear. I know what I want in life and I know that in order to get it I have to stumble a few times, learn a few hard lessons, and gain experience along the way. That’s the beauty of life, the bumpy unknown terrain that lies ahead. Half the fun is the journey and the lessons along the way. So enjoy the lessons and be thankful because you are taking a chance and stepping into the unknown. You are attempting that which many refuse to try for. Do not let fear shackle you down and keep you from experiencing life and achieving your dreams.
As for your writing, let me tell you this. You never know how many lives you can touch. Or what life you can touch or make a difference in. You never know, but you could make a major difference in someone’s life somewhere in this world. Your words, your writing, and your story could be the difference between life and death. I once had a friend who was going through one of the darkest times in his life. He was contemplating suicide. No one could tell at the time, he seemed completely normal and content with life on the outside. But inside he was dying. Screaming for relief from life. I would’ve never known if he hadn’t told me his story years later. Something I wrote gave him hope, gave him a reason to look at his situation a little differently, and to hope and look forward to easier days. He didn’t want to miss out on what life had to offer, so he decided to stick it out and work through the darkness. He told me I made a difference. The time frame was around when I started blogging on this site. So goes to show you, you never know what lives you can touch, change, or save.
Now about your “comfort zone.” If you’re not in your “comfort zone” then that means you are already working on changing and growing. They say, “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” You are only confined and limited by the walls you build around yourself. Do not limit yourself and your growth. Get uncomfortable and experience every single thing life has to offer. What was once new, foreign, and unknown is now familiar and comfortable. So find new comforts. It’s time to branch out and grow. Show the world what you have to offer.
How did self-publishing go? Have you succeeded yet or are you still going through the process to achieve it? If you haven’t started yet, start the process today. Don’t worry about the ones you love. If they truly love you they will understand and love you regardless. If they want to help you achieve your dream let them. I know you are afraid of failure but if they are willing to help you then they obviously see potential in you and believe in your dream as well. So it is time to start seeing the potential within yourself. Believe in your ability and your dream. Take a chance and no matter how hard it gets don’t let setbacks get you down. Above all, don’t become negative because of setbacks or hardship, or failed attempts. You get back out there and keep fighting until you achieve your dream. When someone dismisses you right away by closing a door on you, get your foot in the door. Make them listen. Find ways to get their attention. They also say when the door is open, find a window of opportunity. My Grandmother use to always say “Where there is a will, there is a way.” Another one of her favorite sayings was “Better late than never. Even when you’re late at least you showed up and tried. That’s half the battle.” She helped me not miss out on so much in life. Whenever I’m late for something or take longer than expected to start or achieve something, I don’t worry as much because I’m trying. I’m making an attempt when most would give-up. So be that fighter. Show the world.
I have let my words run away with me but I just wanted to say thank you for taking the time to leave me a message and your words meant the world to me. Please keep me updated on your progress I would love to hear about everything. As well as possibly share your blog or progress with my readers.
I later found out after posting my reply that she has started her blog. It was called “Finding Sahar” but is now called ” Dealing With Sahar: Learning Who I Am.” Please check out her blog and check out her writing. The site is as follows:
Hope you enjoyed our messages, I learned a few things and was definitely inspired all over again by her genuine and touching post.
Love always Katie